Book Recommendation-Click by Rom and Ori Barfman


Don’t all of us remember the time when we just Clicked with someone? You were with someone, sitting or standing or walking, and you started talking and it all felt perfect. Like all the stars aligned and the planets too were aligned and it was an event of great cosmic significance. It was all perfect. You could pour out all you wanted to, without being afraid of seeming clingy or emotional or weird, and the other person reciprocates. You both were on some different plane of existence, and you just got each other.
That is a Click. That magical moment, when you and the other person just, get each other. It could be set off with even a small spark, like some words exchanged in an office, or maybe sitting across each other in a table, or just a random conversation about anything, or shared adversity. Anything.
A click seems pretty simple. You talked, and magic happened. And from there on, the magic took over the entire relationship and you knew you would be with the person for at least forever. But we all know that. What we all don’t know, is what goes behind a Click? A Click is such a rare and simple phenomenon, which happens to all of us in our lives, but we never know how or why it happens. We pass it off as serendipity. Click, the book talks about how Clicks take place. What are the factors involved in it, and how small things, which we often think insignificant or uncomfortable lead to people Clicking.
Honestly, this book is fantastic. I’ve read it twice and what it teaches is fantastic. More importantly, easily applicable in everyday life. A major part of what it talks about is how people come together, Click or not. Not every conversation leads to a Click, but that doesn’t mean that conversation can’t take you forward. It tells you various little nuances of the human mind, such as proximity, similarity, the quality of conversation, personality, environment and how these impact human nature and the way we come close to people.
Clicking is not a very well defined research area; hence a lot of what Rom and Ori talk about in the book comes from personal experience rather than being backed up by statistical data or scientific evidence. So, people who like data and proof whether such things work will need to take a leap of faith. I can vouch for the experiences, since I’ve used many of the techniques in my life.
Vulnerability, one of the first concepts, rarely suited me. Because I used to feel fake being vulnerable at will with someone else; and because I don’t bond well over vulnerabilities, usually. Proximity, on the other hand I’ve seen the effects first-hand. Being in the centre of the line and the end have a lot of impact on how many people you can talk to, and hence Click with. Environment, undoubtedly one of the biggest factors for conversation; and we all know its impact and use.
Even for a causal read, Click offers a lot of insight into how we can better ourselves and make better connections. Because all of us, want to feel good, and make the other person feel good as well, till the time it is the person who licks the teacher’s behind (Let’s face it. We all hate these people). Because awkward conversations make us feel weird as well. Because all of us wouldn’t mind being friends with everybody we can be (or be respected by them, if not liked).
There is nothing much more to say about this book, because it really doesn’t talk about much; rather than me writing it in short form, it would be better to read straight from the book itself. It’s a good book, and also substitutes as good advice to better your personality.


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